I was running late the other day.  I'm usually running late. You can be delayed trying to get somewhere in our area for a million reasons.

One of the worst is long, slow-moving trains. The tracks cut right through the middle of San Angelo, across some of our busiest streets and highways. A long train can add 15 minutes to a short trip through town.

The other day I was late for a reason that seems so Texas. I was following a pickup truck with a cow in the bed. They say F-150s are built "Ford Tough." The one I was following with the cow looked severely distressed.

Cows and pickup trucks are no strangers to Texas. It is perfectly legal to haul a cow in the back of your pickup in Texas. In fact, it can be a common sight during rodeo and livestock show season. There is only one reasonable requirement.  If you transport a cow in the back of your truck, Texas law says it must be secured properly.

The Texas Department of Transportation (TxDot) provides guidelines for transporting animals, including cows, in the back of truck. If a police officer spots a driver transporting a cow without proper safety equiment, they can issue a citation or even impound the cow.

I wonder if impounded cows have the right to remain silent. Are police officers in Texas required to carry cow cuffs? I wonder if that's how police tasers got started. They were for arresting cows and it caught on with unruly people.

All sorts of things went through my head as I was following the truck with the cow in the back. The cow was quite calm.  I was not, however, when the cow suddenly had to go number two. As manure was hitting my windshield all sorts of things were going through my head.

Among them, I wonder if there is a wiper fluid that can cut through manure. If the cow was constipated, could the manure crack my windshield? Would I need a lawyer like the ones advertised on tv?  Wouldn't that make a great lawyer ad?

If you've been injured by flying cow manure out of a pickup truck call ...

So many questions.

Fortunately, I arrived at my destination in one piece and the cow went on about it's business. SInce I was already late, a quick run throught he automatic car wash dealt with the mess on my windshield.

Slow moving tractors require one of those orange triangular signs on the back. For slow moving pickups with highly regular cows riding in the back, maybe we need a brown triangle warning. I think I'll call my state senator.  Guaranteed, that won't be craziest law they'll debate this session.

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